Keep Coming

"Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving. It doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. come, even if you have broken your vows a thousand times. Come, yet again , come , come." ~Rumi

When I find myself in states of illumination--no matter how seldom or often they come--I reach a level of calmness that doesn't accompany me in times when stress, anxiety, worry, sickness, imbalance tend to rule my life.

I'm coming to find--on this journey to awareness and complete health--that just because I have been aware and perfect one day, does not automatically mean that I will have the same experience tomorrow. It just doesn't. I thought it might...and maybe it will. Maybe I need more practice. Maybe I'll have to work at it every day. I don't know.

Something I am finding completely endearing about the human being, is the ability to hope, try, try, try, and hope some more. When you never give up, you never give up. And there is something truly beautiful in that....even if I'd rather be at a place of not having to keep dealing with the same.

High Energy People

"SURROUND YOURSELF WITH HIGH-ENERGY PEOPLE! Choose to be in close proximity to people who are empowering, who appeal to your sense of connection to intention, who see the greatness in you, who feel connected to God, and who live a life that gives evidence that Spirit has found celebration through them." ~ Wayne Dyer

I've been thinking about the people in my life today. I've heard that no one is in your life who isn't supposed to be there. Do you think that is true? Right now--my life-- I spend it with three people only. Just three people. The three people are pretty remarkable people. I love them deeply. In each of their ways, they are adding so much to my life.

But, three people only--that leaves lots of time for me. Lots of time. I live a pretty solitary life right now. I'm more solitary and spend more hours alone in a day than I have ever in my ENTIRE life. And yet, I'm more at peace, more thoughtful, more creative, more more more. I look forward to it and savor it every day because I know it won't last. I rejoice in the time I have to listen to myself and speak to myself and hear myself and really dig deep on issues and set backs and old habits.

I am grateful for this time. It's not going to last much longer. Just four more weeks really. Will that be enough time to center me for the high stress and stamina I'll need at that time? I hope so. I hope I'm solidifying my foundations. I am hoping this quiet time will center and teach me to put myself first (even if it's just for ten minutes in a day) and that from that--all other things fall into place.

My Enemy, My Friend

May I send out some love and thanks to each of you. I've received some pretty powerful emails from a few special girls this week and it's encouraged me in some marvelous ways. One thing I hear again and again (and often times I say it in my own mind) is that we just want to be there, right? The finish line. The end goal. For some, like me, this can seem so far away. It can seem unreachable. It has to be taken in baby steps. Here are a few of my baby steps.

My body is no longer my enemy. I've decided it. Thus it's my new reality. My body is my friend.

This is REVOLUTIONARY in my new world.

Yes, perhaps it is a slow process. But may I ask what the hurry is?

There is none.

Relax. Breathe. Be gentle.

The American culture is constantly feeding our minds with the idea that we must lose 30 pounds in a month, that we must do this and this FAST FAST FAST. It can be easy! It can be quick!

I say, why? I'm on a journey.

I am not even focusing on losing weight. I don't want to focus on that. I've been focusing and obsessing about that since I was 6 years old. I'm over that. That is no longer part of my life story. What I am focusing on is just getting to know my body.

"Hey stomach, are you in need of food yet?"

"Hey stomach, is that enough food?"

"Hey body, how did you feel after I ate that, was that ok?"

"Hey body, what do you need? Have I been denying you of anything lately?"

"Hey body, thanks. Thanks for breathing and circulating and walking and running and feeling the fresh air that filtered down from the top of those beautiful Alps this morning. Just thanks."

What are your baby steps?

That Negative Mind

This week I have been hard at work. I work with people who are sick. I help to make them better. They are mentally and physically sick with an overwhelming negativity about life. They don't feel like they are worth anything. They don't feel like life is worth living sometimes. They starve or stuff or cut themselves. They hurt. They don't want to think these thoughts. They want to feel good and happy. They can't.

I help.

The biggest way that I help is to be a daily presence in their life of positive love energy. I bring kindness with me. I spread compassion. I bring possibility and love and empathy. I do it all in the face of the negative. And I slowly help the negative pathways reconnect to create positive pathways in the brain.

Repetition is key. Every day. For at least a year.

Please, please, for your sake, for your husband and children and family's sake, please be kind to yourself. Right now, this moment. Be gentle. Be loving.

Please do not cultivate guilt, shame, hate, sorrow and negative thoughts about yourself in your mind. Each time you do, you make it more of a habit. These habits ARE breakable. They are! I've seen young girls on the verge of death, 60 pound girls not wanting to live, saying they don't deserve life, I've seen them heal, be whole, be real, be normal, and go on to be shining lights in this world.

I'm sending each of you love and kindness and honor and support. I want each of you to now that you are sensitive. That you try to put others first, and that it's time to start thinking that you are worth it. Because you simply are.

Love is an enegry. It's a force. I'm sending it to you now. Feel it. Let it grow.

You are simply divine.