Sunday, October 10, 2010

Emotions, Foods, Addictions, and Trying again


I'm back to blogging, and I'm getting back to taking care of myself. The last several months have been hard for me. I've been homeless for a large part of the time--staying on my sister's couch, a friends spare bed, and living out of a suitcase and my car. My life, which seemed so glamorous to many, quickly became one that no one would envy.

I haven't blogged on here, for a large part, because I'm embarrassed that I started eating fast food again, that I haven't really made time to exercise, that I have been overeating again, that I've been a bit of an emotional mess. To admit how hard it has been for me to eat healthy is hard for me, but then I realized that this blog is about being real. Very real.

The emotional trauma of my past job has made me seek out the place where I always just feel good--eating. Trying to find a replacement has been hard. Trying to keep changing those thoughts, has been hard. And when you entertain the thoughts you've always entertained, then you slip into all the old habits you've tried to change.

So, here's to starting again. Starting fresh. Being optimistic. Keeping hope alive. And not giving up.

Here we go again!

6 comments:

Hey, It's Ansley said...

Love you and am so proud of you! And grateful because I needed this push today. It can be so discouraging how easy it is to fall back into old bad habits. That it seems like this is something I/you will struggle with for life. But thank you for the reminder that we can always start over and try to redefine who we are.

Stella said...

Thank you! Thank you! It's good to have a support team!

Krisanne said...

Your optimism is inspiring. You have such happy energy about you, and I believe you can do anything!

Lori said...

(((((Stella)))) Thank you for sharing so honestly...for showing that you are human like the rest of us.

When we fall down we have a choice to get back up or stay laying down. I am thankful and happy that you are choosing to get back up.

Falling down does not define us. Nor does it dictate the direction we are going. It doesn't mean failure. The failure is not in trying or chasing after our dreams..it's in staying down for the count.

It means we have the chance to learn and grow...and it's another opportunity to know who we really are. It means we catch our breath and give grace to ourselves for being less then perfect.

You will do it Stella. I believe in you. Here's to new beginnings and starting fresh.

Sending you smiles, hugs and all the love in the universe. XX Lori

Unknown said...

I appreciate your real-ness. I've been on an emotional rollercoaster myself, and really allowing myself to feel my emotions and tell people how I feel. It's hard, but it feels better.

jo said...

thanks for being so real. i'm doing the same thing right now, starting over again. but really, really, REALLY slowly. and it's good, and i know you can do it!