This morning I did something I haven't really done very often. I had a conversation with my body. I did a 40 minute guided meditation and actually connected with my body in a way I can hardly explain. It was FREAKING AWESOME!!!! The meditation came from a CD that was in a book I recently bought called:
Body Mind Balancing: Using Your Mind to Heal Your Body by OSHO
The meditation led me to relax and listen to my body and to then have a conversation (yes, it was partially outloud...sounds strange, I know) with the parts I felt drawn to speak to. I went for it. I had a ten minute conversation with my stomach, kidneys, and colon. These are the parts that I felt most drawn to and the parts that I felt have suffered the most from my eating disorders. There are many times when I have stuffed or starved my poor stomach in ways that are far beyond cruel. When I treat my stomach this way, my kidneys and colon have to bare the after affects of processing all the crap I've put into myself or the lack of food I've NOT put in. In both extremes, my kidneys and colon have been stressed, irregular, hurt, exhausted, stretched, full and even hungry at various times.
It was a really weird thing, but I don't think I've connected with my body like that before. I mean, I was almost talking to my stomach like it was an entity with feelings and desires. And the thing is, since it is part of me, I think that it is. I think my stomach wants the right amount of food in it. It wants to feel comfortable. It wants to be able to perform it's job in all the glory it's supposed to. When I stuff it or starve it, I'm really hurting it's higher purpose and function (and thus, I'm hurting my higher purpose and function).
The meditation went on to have you address an issue your body is suffering from (I chose weight) and then it had you call that issue your "Guardian" because for some reason or other your issues has come out of some part of you that is trying to protect you from something. It has you think about these issues and then think about the ways you deal with these issues and make three alternative ways for you to deal with the issue (over/irregular/not eating for me).
It was REALLY fantastic and put me in a great mood for my day and also more in connection with my dear stomach, who I want to treat with love and kindness.
I have lots more to say on this and I'll do it slowly. But for now, this could be a great book for many of you to check out!
2 comments:
I talk to my body all the time these days. We have many conversations...sometimes I am angry at it. Sometimes I am forgiving. Sometimes I am amazed by what it just accomplished. SOmetimes I think it looks beautiful and sometimes I am angry that this is the vessel I live this life with. All in all, I think the best thing I ever started doing in my self-awareness, self-empowerment was talking to my body. The whole point of this life is to learn to live together as best we can and I'm working on it. It responds. Remember, dear S that your brain is part of your body and hears everything you say to the other parts.
NB--Wow, that was beautiful and really good for me to hear. I think it is a journey we take, to learn to not have a separate mind and body, but to learn how the two can be one and work together. The thing that is hardest to start with is to make it a daily event and not slip back into old habits of ignoring.
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